By Tabitha Bozeman
This week, we lost an incredible poet. Nikki Giovanni passed away at the age of 81 on December 9. During her life and writing career, she wrote poetry for adults and children, nonfiction essays on many topics and won numerous awards, including a Caldecott award, multiple Woman of the Year awards, was the first recipient of the Rosa Parks Woman of Courage Award, received the Woman of Power Legacy award and many more accolades.
What those who loved her work will remember, though, is not necessarily the names of her awards, but the words and feelings and encouragement she shared through her work that allow us to know we are not alone. That is really what I think writing is all about. We read to learn and be entertained, but deep down we all want to know we are not alone in our thoughts and feelings and experiences.
Hopefully, each of us have someone in our lives who lets us know we are not alone — even when we just want to be alone. If we are lucky, we have more than one person who reminds us that we are not alone. This season is one where I am acutely aware of those people in my life now, and when I miss those who are no longer with me, and it never fails to remind me not to take the people in my life for granted, for the seasons spent with them are often shorter than we ever expect.
My husband’s favorite by Giovanni is her spoken word piece “The World is Not a Pleasant Place to Be,” and I think it sums up this hyper-awareness of how significant those in our lives are. She says: “The world is not a pleasant place/ to be without/ someone.”
Right now, in this season, my “someone” is my grown child, three nearly grown children, my husband and many other family members and friends. I am incredibly blessed with those who make life a pleasant place to be. Recognizing this makes me feel for those who may not feel the world is pleasant or have someone with them in this season. When I’ve been in similar seasons, books, stories and poetry have helped fill in the spaces, and I’m grateful to and for them.
I was gifted a lovely, autographed copy of Giovanni’s poetry a few years ago for my birthday by one of “my people”. When I found out this week that Giovanni’s season with us had drawn to an end, I pulled out my books of hers and read through them again. I already know and love and teach her work, but this read-through was different.
In her poetry, over and over again, Giovanni reminds us to see and appreciate the little moments, the big memories and the entire cast of characters in our lives who help us become and know who we are. She reminds us to figure out who we are by saying: “If you don’t understand yourself, you don’t understand anybody else,” and that “Some say we are responsible for those we love. Others know we are responsible for those who love us.” We might not always hit the mark with those around us, but we can try. After all, she says, “I really don’t think life is about the I-could-have-beens. Life is only about the I-tried-to-do. I don’t mind the failure, but I can’t imagine that I’d forgive myself if I didn’t try.”
Take this season to reflect on the “tried-to-dos” and those you tried to do them for.
Tabitha Bozeman teaches English at Gadsden State Community College, is the editor-in-chief of the Cardinal Arts Journal and is a published writer and poet. She is also the founder of Riverside Writers, a local workshopping group for writers. The opinions expressed are her own and do not represent any organization she is a part of. She may be reached at tabithabozeman@gmail.com.